The death of a loved one is an experience that often brings great upheaval to the lives of those who are left behind. It can be difficult to know where or how to begin coping with this loss, especially when you feel like everyone around you has moved on with their lives. This blog post shares some tips for surviving and maybe even thriving witihin grief as a real person and finding community and support during this time.
Tips to Survive Grief as a Real Person: Community and Support. A blog about grief, loss, and the importance of community. Something for real people who are experiencing real-life grief and feel lost. The death of a loved one is an experience that often brings great upheaval to the lives of those who are left behind. It can be difficult to know where or how to begin coping with this loss, especially when you feel like everyone around you has moved on with their lives. This blog post shares some tips for surviving grief as a real person and finding community and support during this time.
-Commit to remaining curious, compassionate and kind to yourself during this process and moving forward
– Seek out a grief support group in your area. These groups can be incredibly helpful in providing you with both emotional and practical support.
– Lean on your friends and family for support. They want to help, so let them.
– Find an online community of people who are also grieving. This can be a great way to find comfort and connect with others who understand what you’re going through.
– Don’t try to go through grief alone. It can help to be around others who are experiencing the same loss, even if you don’t feel like doing much of anything at first.
– Give yourself time and space to process your feelings about what has happened. Grief is a natural response to death, so there’s no need for guilt or shame that comes along with it.
– Don’t be afraid to cry or express your emotions. It’s important to let yourself feel what you’re feeling, even if it’s difficult.
– Take care of yourself both physically and emotionally. Make sure to eat healthy foods, get enough sleep and exercise, and find ways to relax and de-stress.
– Remember that grief is a process that takes time. There’s no set timeline for how long it will take, so be patient with yourself.
– Find ways to honor your loved one’s memory. This can be something as simple as writing down memories or sharing stories about them.
– Seek professional help if you feel like you’re not coping well or are struggling to cope with your loss. A professional can provide you with additional support and guidance during this difficult time.
Grief is a complex experience that can be different for each person who experiences it. These tips are just a starting point, but they may help you as you begin to navigate your way through the grieving process. Remember that you are not alone in this, and there are plenty of people who want to help you.
In my new book First Year of Grief Club: A Gift From A Friend Who Gets It, I join you as a friend for a year of grief offerings and experiments. When I say- “A Friend Who Gets It” I do not mean one who claims to know exactly what you are going through or who can define your grief and how it shows up in your life. No, not at all. Just a friend who knows that the journey of grief healing and even resilience doesn’t end with condolences, funerals, flowers or casseroles. It just begins.
Excerpt from the book:
“Even after losing my brother (to cancer), my father (to suicide), and my friend (in a tragic accident) I never knew what to offer someone when I heard that they were entering Grief Club. I would find myself in this weird paralysis. I never wanted to make eye contact. I didn’t want to let them see my worry, and thereby avoided compassion, empathy, and love twisting into a concerned look, followed by condolences that went sour in my mouth before I even finished speaking or texting. After what I’ve lived through, people always ask me what they should do for someone who has just experienced a devastating and meaningful loss. The pause I take before answering with some hopeful saying I didn’t believe in was one I could no longer reconcile. The pause became a freeze, one that tugged on my soul and not-so-gently asked – why aren’t you showing up in this moment? This book will fill that space where I didn’t know how to show up. This is the, “I heard … and as a friend who gets it, I’m gonna be here with you for the next year.”
This is with you, for you.
But it is all going to come down to you. You will ultimately choose how you come out of this. You will choose whether to open back up to love or retreat. You will choose whether you want to get to know the you that now exists. You will choose if you want to live within loss or die with the death of what once was. This book is a reminder, whether it sits on your nightstand or coffee table, or gets beaten up in your gym bag, that I hope you choose to continue being. When you see it, touch it, open it — you breathe into the safety of knowing, no matter what you are feeling — it’s part of the journey.”